ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
In America we eat man semen.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I love you.
Bad choice
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
