She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Semen is not good for contacts.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
