well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
The feeling are messing with the penis
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
