so I'm never txting u again after today...
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.