hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
21 MILFs That Made The Boys Crazy
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
23 Ladies Who Have Mastered The Art Of Squirting
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done