Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
