Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
