i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Randomize
