YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
