True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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