I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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