Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
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