And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
