I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
