oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
