I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize