perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Randomize
