She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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