she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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