Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize