Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
