why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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