did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
