You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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