its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
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