You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
