did you get engaged???
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
