You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Randomize
