But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
