you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
