the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
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