her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Randomize
