They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Randomize
