As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
