grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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