it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Randomize
