I love having hate sex.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
