This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
