found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
