You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
You don't make any sense
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