he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
