She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Randomize