id be glad to
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
