How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I feel great
I just peed on a car
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
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