youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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