whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Randomize
