she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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