One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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