Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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