Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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