if i can run in heels then i can drive
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
