Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
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